How To Be Resilient Even If Life Knocks You Down
Recent events in the Phillippines affected many people. Looking at the news reports was heartbreaking. But two days afterwards there were signs of smiles, relief at still being alive, plans to rebuild, hope that their lives would continue if only they could get water and food.
Before daybreak I go out again to hang the warmed up feeders in their places. My two hummers are sitting in a small tree right next to the feeders. Their tiny bodies go into a state of torpor ( almost like hibernation) so that they manage to deal with the cold. When daylight comes their breathing and heartbeats return to normal.
As I make my approach I am immediately accosted by these incredibly tiny, feisty little birds. They click at me, hover right in front of my face, and tell me in no uncertain terms that I need to leave the food and move away. Ingratitude perhaps? I pretend their formidable greeting is actually a demonstration of delight!
“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.”
It seems to be the ability to bounce back after tragedy or adversity and continue on, finding new ways to deal with the loss. The exciting thing is that you can improve your resilience.
Let's give a closer look to this . . .
7 ways to develop your happiness and resilience:
This has to be a starring way to grow as a person! Once you figure out there are others you can help, emotionally, spiritually, physically, whatever you can give, magical things happen in your own life. It never fails. Note, be cautious when thinking you can help financially. There are lots of sharks out there, disguised as angel fish!
2. Being open to asking for help as you work through the misfortune you have suffered.
When you are so down that you just feel you can't help someone, it is time for you to ask for help. Showing you need it helps you in your quest to rise up beyond your tragedy. Allowing others to help you can sometimes be the push to open that door.
3. Believing in your own ability and talents
Sometimes life has so beaten you down that you have simply forgotten your own abilities to accomplish good things in life. Take some time to write them down. Sharing your talents gives you so much more interest in developing them to a higher level. Take time too, just to write one little thing you can do next week to develop your special ability!
4. Managing your erratic impulses
Well, personal tragedy does have a way of really messing up your thought processes! Been there, done that, don't want to do it again! Understand that the shock of loss seems to make some chemical changes in your brain.
That's why you can't sleep, can't read, don't seem to be able to cope. It's horribly uncomfortable, but don't make the rash moves that your mind tells you to do. Give yourself a timeline to make any big decisions.
5. Not seeing yourself as a victim
It's easy to become bitter in your own sadness, to feel you can never forgive this event that has been thrust upon you. it seems that few others care about your pain. They just carry on with their lives. Its natural to grieve, and for that process to take a long time.
Allow yourself time. But always know that every small step you take towards where you want to be is developing your ability to be resilient and wonderful in the future.
6. Welcoming new experiences and new friends
Being open to new activities, responsibilities, education, people and the unknown helps you to be happy again. Resilience and happiness are closely tied. It's almost like the horse and carriage - you can't have one without the other.
7. Finding meaning in your life
The journey of self-discovery can be long and challenging. Resilience helps you to understand life events, to weep, scream, shout and rage. But after all that is done, it keeps you interested in finding ways to have meaning in your life. With resilience you sink sometimes in the ocean of pain, but always pop up and float again.
The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience. - Eleanor Roosevelt